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Velcro Mary

 

The Loved Ones: Self-Titled EP
[Jade Tree]

On their self-titled EP, Philadelphia-based the Loved Ones try to revive an ailing pop-punk. While their effort never rises above imitation, each song has a moment of pure fast-guitar-head-throwing joy.

When considering a three-piece band that subsists mainly on high vocals and heavy guitar, the first question that comes to mind is, Why? Ted Leo and the Pharmacists effectively closed the bored-kids-hopping genre, and until a band can move past colliding bass lines and attacks on drum sets, theyre just re-fighting Hearts of Oak.

The Loved Ones illustrate this perfectly with Chicken. Ostensibly about a guy not wanting to call a girl because hes afraid of feeling desperate, the song quickly ditches the plot, instead repeating the phrase Its killing me. Unconsidered lyrics such as those arent even a Ted Leo rehash; they border on New Found Glory.

Yet it is precisely this aesthetic, one so simple it borders on unintelligent, that lends the songs their charm. 100K, with its charging lead-in and insistent chorus, recalls half of my adolescent CD collection. Sure, Im embarrassed of those albums now, but they all successfully appealed to baser aural desires. The Loved Ones do as well, but now it seems more hackneyed than idealistic.

Surprisingly, for a band that is constructed around the electric guitar, the Loved Ones best song is acoustic. Drastic keeps the halfhearted anger from the earlier songs, this time using it to rally similarly halfheartedly angry adolescents. It suffers from the same lyrical laziness as Chicken: With our bombs and our pills we think weve made things safe. Unlike the earlier song, however, the chorus is a virtue. Singer Dave Hause complains of a forced hand in terms as simple as the best rhetoric, and its good justification. Theyve pushed us right to the edge, so we might as well have a good time tonight.

For all the fun of their repeated lyrics and riffs, The Loved Ones still seems calculated. Theyre three guys with tattoos and black T-shirts, and nothing to distinguish them from a hundred other bands fighting for a spot on Fuse. The Loved Ones are at their best when recalling earlier groups, but they never rise above tribute.

-Will Sommer
4/18/05

This album can be purchased at Amazon, Insound, and CD Universe

The Loved Ones Official Website

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